Gaurang Fabian - The Birth(Day) Story

When I got back home from the doctor’s office in the late afternoon of Mar.23, '05, I wanted to do several things, including finish packing the bag I would take to the hospital the next day. Or so, I thought…!

You see…I didn’t go to any 'Birth Preparation' course (because my doctor said there weren’t any available. Later on, I discovered that there was one in the hospital where Fabi was born! Oh, well...!) I took care of my own preparation. I did extensive research and read as much as I could from books and the Internet about how to deal with childbirth. I had read a very good book (which unfortunately I don’t have with me any more, and I don’t remember the title or the author), but it fully prepared me for the big day.

I felt positive, strong, capable, ready….SO ready! I wanted a 100% natural, drug-free birth and was very happy to know that my doctor shared the same idea. I had read about the three stages of labor. I had learned that pain normally warns the body that something is wrong, but the pain of childbirth has a reason, and having contractions was a ‘good thing’ because it meant that I was getting closer to meet my baby.

I was expecting the contractions to be mild and far apart in time during the first stages, which I knew took a long time. Then I had prepared myself to be in (strong) pain for the last stage, which I knew (or hoped!) would go by quickly.

I had read many birth stories and I knew about many eventualities that had happened to real people and how they went about them. I didn’t want any surprises, so I read a lot!

What I didn’t expect was to come home and start feeling constant waves of indescribable pain right away after the induction. I tried to gain control, but Ishan had to finish closing up my bag: instead of spending the night at home I wanted to be in the hospital just in case something was not right. (Later I realized what the books meant by "induced labor can be more painful than normal labor'. NO KIDDING!...)

I made a phone call to my parents and instead of a cheery call to say: ‘Good news! I’m on my way to the hospital!’, the pain wouldn’t let me talk! The words my parents spoke were SO powerful that I regained confidence and strength and I knew that everything was going to be ok!

The hospital is five minutes away and I used to joke about how I could go walking in case I went into labor. Instead, I was glad Ishan drove me there and I think it must have been around 10:00pm when I was admitted.

The hospital room that was booked for me was brand new, very nice (had telephone, t.v., my own bathroom, extra bed-for Ishan-, a crib for the baby, air conditioner, nice big window, a fresh red rose every morning). The equivalent of a ‘Five Star’ hotel room, especially if I compare it to some other hospitals I have seen in this area. The way it works here is that the hospital is privately owned. My doctor didn’t work at that hospital, but sometimes she practiced there if her patients requested it. Also, the patients need to buy all the necessary supplies from the hospital drugstore located on the ground (first) floor. The advantage of this particular hospital (besides being the best one in the area), is that it's really close to our house, although there was no food service (for patients or non-patients). So as soon as I got to the room, Ishan had to leave to buy the necessary supplies that the nurses said I would need.

I had plenty of time to get acquainted with the room and try to gain control. I’m the type of person who likes to be alone when in pain/distress. I don’t want anybody to hold my hand: "thankyouverymuch, don’t touch me, I need to concentrate, I need to breathe".

I spent a total of 19 hours in labor pain: since the first 12 hours where at nighttime, I pretty much got my wish of spending time alone. But when the morning hours came by, people started to flow in. I had not slept because the pain wouldn’t let me, so I was very tired. Now I had to answer all kind of questions from different nurses and med-students and somehow I always had to explain that: “No, I’m not from India. Costa Rica is a small Central American country.” Ouch! Another contraction!…

My doctor showed up a couple of times. I remember her telling me that I ‘was doing very good’. She liked the way I was handling each contraction with my breathing (just like she had taught me). Later I was told that my face would become very red each time I had to handle a contraction through breathing.

Unfortunately, during those 19 hours of unspeakable pain I showed no progress: the cervix is supposed to dilate 10 centimeters for the baby to be born. But I never went past 4, despite the Pitocin and the rupturing of membranes (bag of waters) that the doctor suggested. 19 hours is a long time: my tiredness had gone from exhaustion to fatigue. At some point, I allowed myself to brake down (for a whole 30 seconds!) and the person who was there to witness it was Ishan’s mother, who at that point gave me the most powerful and loving hug. I will never forget that! When I came home from the hospital I gave her a bouquet of red roses and thanked her, but I don’t think she knows how much better she made me feel with that hug. Me! The one who ‘doesn’t-like-to-be-touched-when-in-pain’ me! She recharged my energy in a very loving way and for that I will always be very thankful to her! ! Ishan’s parents had taken a train at 11:00pm and were in Vashi at around 8:00am – ready to help and welcome their first grandbaby.

I also remember Priya giving me back rubs and Sopan ready to give me his cellphone in case I wanted to call my parents. I appreciate their help and support.

It was mid-afternoon when my doctor showed up again and she asked everyone to leave the room, except for Ishan. The three of us decided that since I was showing no progress a C-Section was the next best thing. It was an emergency operation.

Fabian is my little Apostle; he was born at around 3:00pm on a Maundy Thursday. After I heard him cry, I asked if the baby was indeed a boy. I heard a 'Yes, he is!' and I fell asleep and woke up just by the time I was being taken back to my room. Ishan picked him up and put him next to me. His eyes were dark gray like coal and his skin was the softest thing I have ever touched! Nothing compares to the silky touch of a newborn! I stayed in the hospital one more day so that I could be close to Fabi (he need 24 hours of phototherapy).

Later on, Ishan told me that he and his mother were waiting outside the operation room (here known as the 'operation theather'). When a nurse came outside to hand Fabi to him, the baby seemed so very small that Ishan decided it would be better for his Mom to hold him. Their immediate reaction was: 'He looks just like Mari!' That might have been true at the beginning, but slowly Fabi’s features have been changing and he now looks more like his Daddy.

Fabi 3 days old

Later that week, Ishan and I brought Fabi home and I haven’t slept through a whole night ever since! :)

His paternal grandparents were with us during his first month. I was treated like a queen! I didn’t have to worry about my food or Ishan’s food and Fabi always had someone to wash his cloth diapers during those first days. He also had the advantage of getting a bath and an oil massage every day!

Fabi’s maternal grandparents came to meet him on his second month. We all went to Agra and see the Taj Mahal. Then it seems like I just blinked and he’s no longer a baby. He’s officially a toddler!

MARCH 2005

MARCH 2006

Please click here to see the album of sample pictures we have from our Photo Session dedicated to celebrate Fabi's first year. Which do you like best? Which do you suggest we get enlarged?